Fast

As I write this post I am sitting in the corner of a slightly dark and awfully quiet room. My dad is sitting next to me, and my mom is lying in a very deep sleep on the hospital bed in front of us.


Life comes at you fast.

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Yesterday at this time everything was normal... I went to classes, talked to friends, and texted my mom during Old Testament. She told me to head up to the house for our Thursday lunch. I went, and, of course, ate an unhealthy amount of Eggo waffles as I talked everyone's precious ears off with my pointless stories. A few minutes after finishing, my dad casually sat down and said, "I'm glad you're here because me and mom have something to tell you." Despite his calm approach, I immediately knew it was something bad... and I immediately panicked. 

"This morning mom went to the doctor and they found a mass about the size of a clementine in the caecum of her large intestine."

"The doctors aren't positive, but they are pretty sure Mom has colon cancer."

Silence...

Alright...let the water works officially begin.


I was an emotional bawling mess for a large portion of the day.

But that's ok. To be honest, I couldn't tell you why I was such a wreck. Everyone around me was telling me it was going to be just fine, including my mom. But I guess, for me, the tears just come naturally when I am worried. 

Worried and frustrated at my lack of control. 

Anyway, that all happened yesterday, March 9. The surgery (right hemi colectomy) was scheduled for this morning at 6:00. 

It's behind us now, and thankfully everything went well. They got the baseball sized mass (which was cancer) out of her body, and I am now sitting with her in the recovery room... so jealous of her deep sleep and total state of oblivion.

So everything went well, right?

Yes. As far as removing the tumor, or mass, or whatever you want to call it. But that's not the end of the story. According to the doctor, there is still a possibility that some of the cells broke through the walls and spread to other parts of Mom's body. If that is the case, then there's a chance that she will have to undergo chemo therapy treatments.

We won't know until Tuesday or Wednesday, but we are hoping and praying that she is clear.

Please do the same.

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This whole experience was so unexpected, and it all happened so fast. But I can definitely say that in that short amount of time I have been so proud to have these two people as my parents. They are such great examples to me of love and support. I am also happy to see that so many in the community feel that same love for them. I have been amazed as I've watched visitor after visitor come to check up on Mom, card upon card wishing her a sincere "get well soon," and endless phone calls, countless emails, and even a few text messages. It is so comforting to know that both my mom and dad are loved and looked out for by everyone they know. They are always giving service to others, and I'm so thankful to see it come back to them during their time of need. It means a lot. 

Right before mom went into surgery, she texted me:

'"You don't need to worry, you just need to have faith" 
-Julie B. Beck'

It's quite ironic that she is the one that sent this to me, but it's no secret that she is a very strong women. And I am so thankful for that. There have already been many times when this quote is the very thing that has saved me and my worried self from, once again, becoming a mini Niagara Falls :) 

I have a feeling that I will continue to remind myself of this quote through this whole process. I am anxious for Wednesday to get here, but until then, there is no time to worry, just time to have faith that everything will work out.

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When Mom wakes up I am going to have her use my ipod to listen to Yanni. He definitely creates healing music :)

And she needs that right now.

I love her.